Forgiveness actually benefits your heart health and your mental well-being. Normon Cousins once stated, "Life is an adventure in forgiveness."
**Note - the recording cuts out midway, but stay tuned, most of the show is there and you still get a great message. It was just a minor part that is missing. Keep reading below and I'll include the parts that are missing.
Check out this blog: The Daily Motivator and his post about The Value of Forgiveness. He has a beautiful message. It is short, sweet, profound and a perfect complete message on forgiveness.
The holidays are the perfect time to give yourself and others the gift of forgiveness. You'll have a better holiday. Some celebrations can be very painful as the past pain sneaks up on you or you hold yourself back.
It isn't always easy to do for everyone, but we've got ideas to help. Tune into the Get Real! with Mark and Kally show to catch our show: The Power of Forgiveness.
Peace is not possible without forgiveness. Martin Luther King once said, “Forgiveness is not an occasional act; it is a permanent attitude.” It is a daily act of living a life of peace.
The dictionary defines the word forgive as: To grant pardon for or remission of an offense or debt. To absolve. To give up all claim on account of. To cease to feel resentment against. To cancel liability.
Forgiveness can be very difficult. However, it is much easier to do than living with resentment. Forgiveness allows you to learn the lessons of life and move forward. It is important to forgive yourself and others even when they don't ask for it.
Forgiveness is very powerful and it CAN transform your life. When you forgive, you are NOT saying that the offence is okay. Your are saying that you are not going to continue to or even begin to feel resentment.
We can learn a lot about the Amish people and their experience of daily forgiveness. In 2006, terrible tragedy struck and many might have felt they were justified in being angry. But instead, they chose to forgive. Read more about their story.
Cherie Carter-Scott said, "Anger makes you smaller, while forgiveness forces you to grow beyond what you were."
Dr. Darren Weissman so eloquently described situations in life as "gifts in strange wrapping paper." The strange wrapping is the experiences in life that you wouldn't always choose, and it is strange wrapping - but there is a gift - there is always a gift. When you see the gift - the lesson - you can move past the event. You can gain power from the experience rather than lose your power.
Start by looking at what your'll really upset about.
Next look at how you've handled your pain and your hurt. What is the cost of holding onto these grudges and disappointments? What is the cost in energy, intimacy, and self-esteem?
Then you have to decide to let go and forgive. Don't wait for someone to ask your forgiveness. Let go of your anger, blame and resentment. This in turn frees you from what binds you to the person that caused the offence or is at the center of it.
As you let go and forgive you will find you are set free.
Forgiveness requires that you accept the past. There is no power to change the past. Holding a grudge or resentment means you want to change the past and that cannot happen. All you can do is accept what is and what it was.
BUT YOU CAN CHANGE THE MEANING OF IT for you. This is the key point. Your interpretation of events can be changed - your beliefs.
Karol Truman has a great chapter on forgiveness in her book Healing Feelings from Your Heart, she teaches to write out forgiveness statements many many times until I releases in us. Check her book out.
Carol Tuttle said in her book, Remembering Wholeness, "…forgiveness of anyone who hurts us in our journey is required if we want to graduate into higher states of light and truth. Our inability to forgive will keep us stuck, make us sick, and cause us to die eventually. The opposite of forgiveness is blame and resentments: two of the lowest vibratory states we can reach. Forgiveness is a process of releasing us to higher vibrations of gratitude, charity, of peace…"
Most if not all of us have experienced pain and hurt. People wrong others - it happens. Have you experienced anger. I have and hurt so bad, I just wanted to scream and get off the planet hurt. I have noticed at those times, my health suffers and I don't grow - I literally can feel a difference in vibrant energy. I was holding onto so much that at one point I had become so angry and closed off. I needed to feel unconditional love - I had no idea what that was. As I was praying and meditating on unconditional love, I had a profound experience - I felt this vibration of unconditional love and it was beautiful!!!! I knew I wanted more. I let go of the past, the pain, and the resentments. I thought I had tried to do that before - but not successfully. The power of love really did help.
In the coming days and weeks I was forever changed - so much so that people close to me noticed. In fact one of my aunts "lovingly" said, I didn't like you much before - you were not nice (I didn't realize I wasn't being nice) and now you're so different and I really enjoy being around you.
What is key here is - SHE DIDN'T know I might be entitled to some anger or entitled to the baggage I was carrying around. SHE DIDN'T know I was wronged, attacked, and hurt. But what happened is - I let the experience take over my life - I didn't set out to do that, but because I held on, it affected me. While I tried to be a good person, slowly over time, the low vibrations took over.
When I accepted unconditional love - this vibration took over because I chose to let go. I chose to see others as showing love in the only way they knew how. I chose to re-frame my perspective of the past and accept love and accept the gifts of those experiences. I wouldn't trade them for anything - they made me who I am.
Studies show that forgiving others is actually very good for your health and it reduces stress in your body. Even the Mayo Clinic said forgiveness brings with it plenty of health benefits, improved relationships, decreased anxiety and stress, lower blood pressure, lower risk of depression and a stronger immune system. Holding grudges can cause physical pain.
One study showed that those who had the ability to forgive, tended to live longer. http://inspiyr.com/health-benefits-of-forgiveness/
There is a growing trend in November to focus on gratitude. A great idea. Let us focus December on forgiveness and beginning a new.
Chronic hostility and anger and are among the most toxic forms of stress and not good emotional baggage to bring to a holiday celebration.
Buddha said, "Holding onto anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned." Holding a grudge doesn't fix anything.
Forgiveness improves ALL your relationships.
Focus on the the here and now. What experiences do you want to create.
For some more great tips on forgiveness, check out Wayne Dyer's website. He has a great article written, "How to Forgive Someone Who Has Hurt You: In 15 Steps".
Listen in with us for some tips to help make forgiveness a part of your daily life. If you are struggling, call or come in and talk to us. The LifeLine Technique and the EVOX are both wonderful tools that help. Read more about them on this page.
Mark and Kally
Indigo Mountain: Wellness, Toys & Gifts
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